The definition of “desire” is to want strongly or to crave. Everyone has desires, but they certainly vary depending on your current economic situation and your environment. For people who have very little, their desire might be for simple things such as food, shelter, a vehicle or even a job. Their desire may be as generic as simply wanting more from life and an urgency to leave behind their current life for a more fulfilling one. It might be wrapped around the selfless desire to want more for their family and children, or it may be selfishly wanting to take care of their own needs and cravings even at the expense of others.

For the middle class, it may be a nicer car, family boat, bigger home, a promotion, dream vacation, wanting children or many other material things that might bring perceived joy. Where people of lesser means might define some of their desires as “needs”, the middle class might be more inclined to define many of their desires as “wants”. The problem with having stuff is that there is always stuff that you don’t have, and if you are laying awake
watching television at two o’clock in the morning, you are going to see stuff that you can’t live without. They have stuff on television at that hour that you did not even know you needed until they convinced you that your life would be better with it, and since you are only half awake at that hour, you actually agree with them and buy it (“But wait, there’s more! Buy now, and we will double your order!”).

People of greater wealth also have desires, and they have the means to make their desires become a reality. If they desire a yacht, they will buy it. If they want a winter home in Sun Valley, then they will simply fulfill their desire and buy it. This group also falls under the “want” and not necessarily “need” category. Many people in this financial segment of the population fulfill their desires in an attempt to bring them happiness or gratification. As most of us know, this is simply a carrot that is dangled in front of us trying to convince us that once we reach the carrot, life will be better. Once we consume the carrot, then we will need
another carrot to fulfill our endless appetite for wanting to be happy and believing that “things” will achieve that. Our desires become never ending and happiness is always about “someday,” which is like the eighth day of the week that never comes. The problem is that people who are waiting for “someday” or tomorrow to be happy do not enjoy life today because they are sitting at the front door and waiting for happiness to arrive (it is always in the future). People who live like this are continually disappointed and prone to depression.

For the more spiritual or less materialistic people, their desires may be for a higher education, being stress-free, world peace, eliminating famine from the earth, good health of family and friends or other non-material requests. It might be the desire to help others or to serve the community as a whole, and thank goodness the world has many of these selfless
people. As many people have thankfully learned, the giver’s rewards can be far greater than the receiver’s. What I mean by that is the act of giving to others is selfish in some ways because the feelings of gratification that come with philanthropy are so huge that givers sometimes get more out of the process than the receivers. 

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Brad Worthley is an accomplished consultant and behavior change specialist with over 30 years of service culture, personal development and leadership development experience. Share: